Don't get married before you read this!

Sex and Intimacy Questions to Consider

With Your Future Spouse

I have to admit that these are not my questions but I think they are a fabulous idea and the questions really relevant. Even if you are already married and battle with intimacy I suggest you ask and answer these questions.

If you are the author of these questions please let me know so I can credit you.

Intimacy questions

·         What does intimacy mean to you?

o   Read and discuss The Five Love Languages. Determine what love languages you and your future spouse speak.

·         Do you think it is important to continue dating after you are married? If so, how often?

·         Do you find it hard to ask for and extend forgiveness to others?

o   To yourself?

o   Do you find it hard to receive forgiveness?

·         Do you know how to discuss differences of opinion in a respectful manner?

·         Do you and your future spouse view issues such as sex, finances and family planning in a similar way?

Sexual questions

·         What is your plan for your first night together?

o   Do you want to try to have full intercourse the first night?

·         Do you know where the hymen is located?

o   Do you wish to have it broken prior to your first night by a gynecologist or to break it together on your first night?

·         Is lingerie exciting to you?

·         Are you comfortable with your body?

·         How do you feel about being naked?

·         What kinds of birth control options do you have and which one would you like to use to begin with?

·         How often do you think it is reasonable for a married couple to have sex?

·         What type of lubrication do you wish to use if there isn’t enough produced naturally?

·         Which sexual practices do you see as unacceptable?

·         Which sexual practices are you uncomfortable with performing even though they may not be Unacceptable?

·         What are your views on giving oral sex?

·         What are your views on receiving oral sex?

·         Swallowing semen?

·         What are your views on anal sex?

·         What are your views on the use of sex toys, such as vibrators?

·         What are your views on masturbation while you are together?

·         What are your views on masturbation while you are apart?

·         What are your views on manually stimulating each other’s genitals?

·         Have you participated in any masturbation until this point in your life?

o   How do you feel about it?

·         What are your views regarding sexual activity during menstruation?

o   Is it to be avoided completely?

o   Should only intercourse be avoided?

·         Do you have any sexual complications in your past?

·         Do you have any sexual abuse in your past?

o    Have you processed the pain (through counseling if necessary) and become free from its power over you?

·         Do you have any fears regarding sex?

·         Are you aware of the process of how a female becomes aroused and responds sexually?

·         Do you know where the clitoris is?

·         Do you know what it does?

·         Are you aware of the process of how a male becomes aroused and responds sexually?

·         Are you aware that there is often a time difference between how long a female needs stimulation and how long a male needs stimulation in order to orgasm?

·         Why is foreplay important?